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Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in Youranidiot's LiveJournal:

Wednesday, March 15th, 2006
9:29 pm
Bitches and Blowjobs
I recently read this on a girl's website:

WHAT A GIRL HAS TO SAY ON THE SUBJECT OF BLOWJOBS


1. First and foremost, we are not obligated to do it.

2. Extension to rule ..1 - So if you get one, be grateful.

3. I don't care WHAT they did in the porn video you saw, it is not standard practice to cum on someone's face.

4. Extension to rule ..3 - No, I DON'T have to swallow.

5. My ears are NOT handles.

6. Extension to rule ..5 - do not push on the top of my head. Last I heard, deep throat had been done. And additionally, do you really WANT puke on your dick?

7. I don't care HOW relaxed you get, it is NEVER OK to fart.

8. Having my period does not mean that it's "hummer week" - get it through your head - I'm bloated and I feel like shit so no, I don't feel particularly obligated to blow you just because YOU can't have sex right now.

9. Extension to ..8 - "Blue Balls" might have worked on high school girls - if you're that desperate, go jerk off and leave me alone with my Midol.

10. If I have to pause to remove a pubic hair from my teeth, don't tell me I've just "wrecked it" for you.

11. Leaving me in bed while you go play video games immediately afterwards is highly inadvisable if you would like my behavior to be repeated in the future.

12. If you like how we do it, it's probabl y best not to speculate about the origins of our talent. Just enjoy the moment and be happy that we're good at it. See also rule ..2 about gratitude.

13. No, it doesn't particularly taste good. And I don't care about
the protein content.

14. No, I will NOT do it while you watch TV.

15. When you hear your friends complain about how they don't get blow jobs often enough, keep your mouth shut. It is inappropriate to either sympathize or brag.

16. Just because "it's awake" when you get up does not mean I have to "kiss it good morning."



...and here is my response to it:

1. Yes you are... it's one of the commandments.

2. This should actually be reversed... if a man LETS you give him a blow job...YOU should be grateful.

3. They do that in pornos because pornos were invented in a day when women were as they should be: subserviant, and grateful. Women just need to get back in touch with their roots.

4. You don't HAVE to...but it'll be difficult not to when I clamp my hand over your mouth, and squeeze your nose shut.

5. Why do you think women HAVE ears? It's not like they listen.

6. A blowjob isn't a blowjob if there isn't puking involved.

7. If I bless you with a holy fart... thou shalt appreciate it, and furthermore reward me by continuing my blowjob.

8. ... How about men and women make a deal...if she doesn't blow you while on her period...you can punch her in the mouth.

9.This one, I agree with...however, I've never left a girl to go masturbate without her being a bitch about it.

10. Don't wreck it for me...and I won't tell you you've wrecked it for me.

11. If you're lucky...I'll just be letting you blowing me while I play video games.

12. I have a little hint for you, sweety... no girl can REALLY do it well. Unless you have no teeth.

13. Who the fuck cares if it tastes good? You don't drink it because you like it.

14. I don't remember giving the option of saying "no"

15. since when have I been appropriate?

16. It's funny how you cuten it up with "kiss it good morning"... I would just say "suck it you dumb, bitch... and then make some breakfast"

Who does this broad think she is?

I'm gonna go get a blowjob right now... and laugh at the bitch who wrote this as I cum on my bitch's face, and play video games.
Monday, January 23rd, 2006
4:04 pm
Ugly Chicks
If you're ugly...honestly... just own up to it, and don't go out too much.

If you think that all your friends are a lot prettier than you are... then they are. You're ugly, and they're not. You are the ugly friend. And they are only friends with you because you make them look good by comparison. I'm not saying you should kill yourself...unless you're fat AND ugly. But c'mon...put on some make-up...or at least wear some baggy clothes so I don't have to look at your gross body.

Eh...on second thought...maybe you should just kill yourself. Or get REALLY good at giving head. Or carry around a brown paper bag in your purse.

Don't complain that you're ugly...no one likes to listen to an ugly bitch cry.

So your options are... kill yourself, make uglier friends than yourself, go live in the wild with animals, carry around a paper bag, or stay in your house, and never come out.

Please choose one.

Thank you.
3:54 pm
Old People
Old people should just die. The hollocaust was a good idea...but it's not jews that should have been put in concentration camps...it's old people. If I had the means to make a shower that sprayed gas instead of water, I'd put an ad for it in the newspaper...in the same place as the grocery store coupons.

There are a number of reasons old people should die.

1) They are poor drivers.

2) They take too goddamn line to pay for shit with exact change, or with coupons.

3) They don't understand the way things work.

4) They smell.

5) In no way are they a benifit to anyone.

There is no one on the face of the planet more useless than an old person. They can't even watch fucking movies anymore to keep themselves occupied...because they can't figure out how to use a fucking DVD. Children can controle a DVD player. The remote is not so different from a TV remote.

A computer bewilders them, and I don't know how much you can actually do these days without a computer.

If you have a sick or dying grandparent, put them out of their and my misery. I'd want to die if I was so fucking useless.

All they do is sit around, use up money, and complain about dumb shit.

I believe old people are also the reason Bush is the president for the second time. That's enough to want to kill them right there.

The only thing more useless than an old person, is a fat ugly girl.

So I guess the point I'm trying to make is that if you're old... or you're fat and ugly... kill yourself.
Friday, March 25th, 2005
1:47 am
Niggers
There are a few things I don't understand about niggers today.

But first I would like to explain something to ALL black people: "Nigger" does not mean ignorant. I don't know how that rumor got started. It IS an offensive word...but it's definition is:

nigger

n : (ethnic slur) offensive name for a Black person

That's IT.

"Nigga" is not ANY different (let alone better) than "Nigger". As a matter of fact... they're defined as synonyms in the dictionary.


My most recent observations of MANY black people are that they are louder, dumber, more promiscuous, more dangerous, more irrational, less comprehensive, and more apathetic than ANY other race as a whole.
And don't give me that bullshit about stereotyping... they stereotype themselves. Liking chicken is not limited to a black person trait... but it seems that they make it a bigger deal themselves. If I had a nickle for every time I heard a black person say "I love me some chicken"... I'd be a fuckin millionaire. On the other hand I'd be broke if I made the same wager with white people.
There are movies made by black people, starring black people, and FOR black people called "The Watermelon Heist", "Da Block Party" "She Hate Me" "Cookout"... If you don't want racist stereotypes kept around... STOP enforcing them! If you want us to think you're educated... at least don't name your movies ebonically. And if you want us to think you have a sense of humor... stop making movies like Cookout. Queen Latifa buying Thin Mints from a girlscout is NOT funny. All the black people that watched that movie laughed at that part. That makes NO sense... is the joke "Queen Latifa likes thin mints...SO DO I! I can identify with Queen Latifa!"? Because that's not a joke. It does not take a sense of humor... to like Thin Mints.

And how is it that you are SO belligerent towards white people. Yes... your people were oppressed by us for a long time... but let it go! Jews were slaves for SO much longer than black people by Egyptians, etc. and that was BEFORE the holocaust! So quit your bitching... the Jews had it much harder than you EVER had it... and you don't hear them complaining all the time.

And for GOD SAKES don't let your ineptitude bleed in to your children's lives! I recently volunteered at a Boys and Girls Club... and heard children in second and third grade children calling each other "niggers" and "crack heads"... that is unbelievable to me.

A finally... for all you black people that break the mold... get good educations, make something of yourselves... congratulations... but why can't THAT be the mold to break?
Monday, January 3rd, 2005
4:12 am
Fat Chicks
What's with all the fat chicks wearing revealing clothing? If you are fat, you are gross.

Fat = ugly

Fat chicks have no place wearing tight pants or low riders. They should not wear halter tops, tube tops, or V-neck shirts. But MOST IMPORTANTLY fat girls should not wear bikinis. I don't understand what possesses a fat girl to think wearing a bikini is alright.

If you think you might be fat... you are. Quit your bitching, put down the twinky, and go work out. Don't ask your boyfriend if your fat. The answer is probably "yes"... but he'll lie to you. This is of course if you found some black guy who loves "round women" to love you.

Now, if you are fat... and you want to do something about it working out is good. But don't jog on a street where people can see you. Nobody likes to see a fat chick struggling on the side of the road. And be careful... nobody likes a muscular chick.

Fat girls, remember:
Being good at blowjobs is not a substitute for being good looking.
Sunday, December 12th, 2004
11:08 am
Raped bitches
If you've been raped... CONGRATULATIONS! You should take it as a compliment, not some life-altering event that happend to you! SOMEBODY thought you were hot enough to rape! So Quit your bitchin'!

If you've been raped...and you didn't like it...that's simply the rapists fault. And to those rapists I have to say: Go practice a little more.

I know that the women I rape, personally thank me for raping them. As all women should.

If you're one of those rapists that kill, on the other hand...that's just unneccessary. There's no reason to KILL the rapee. There are so many ways to avoid a tattler. Cum in her eye so she can't see you as your running away...or bite out her toungue so she can't scream... beat her into submission... the possiblities are endless. And if you do the job right...like I said...they should thank you.

Come to think of it...they should thank you either way. Hey...atleast you didn't kill them.

Now, back to the girls that have been raped. You have to admit...I must have been pretty hot. Unless you were sleeping. If you WERE sleeping, the dude should have woken you up...so that atleast you knew you were being raped.

I'm a hopeless romantic at heart...I like to gently rouse the sleeping ones with a cock in the mouth... then poor chocolate sauce on them. Then lick it off them as much as I can while they squirm to get away.

I also like roleplaying. The other night...I was the "creepy stalker" while Sherry was my "helpless victim".

And for all of you who are about to call me a hypocrite...she ASKED me to kill her.
Monday, December 6th, 2004
10:14 pm
As Far As Posts Go...
I will never respond to a comment in the comments section. That is to say I will never post in the comments section...I will only post on the main page...therefore...anybody using the verbage "I" when describing themselves...is not refering to the author of this livejournal.





As Always...



I hope you all die.
9:50 pm
Quick Note...
You will need to read this website from the bottom post...to the top...due to Livejournal's layout...

And don't forget the fun-loving reply posts!
Sunday, December 5th, 2004
11:01 pm
Women, Part: Deux
Jesus Christ! What is everyone's fucking beef?

Why is everybody talking about women like they're people? And why the fuck are women standing up for themselves at all!? This is what I'm talking about! There's no way these bitches are cleaning a room AND replying to my post at the same time! It's impossible! Get back to work, bitches!

Some stupid bitch named "elanyi" (by the way, you misspelled Elaine) had this to say: "You have no friends, your birth was probably an accident, your parents hate you, you're incompetant. I bet you're the fat, ugly, greasy, pimply guy who masturbates to porn because he can't get a real woman, who orders takeout every night because he's too retarded to cook for himself."

To which I reply:
"are you getting alittle aroused imagining the details of my life that you completely made up in 4 seconds? Honestly...where do women get this stuff. I'll tell you where they didn't get it... the kitchen...which brings me back to my question: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING OUT OF THE KITCHEN!?"

oo...she also said this:

"Have you fucked your mother yet?" (what a stupid thing to say...clearly a woman)

I'm sorry...I...I don't see the connection between my sexual relationship with my mother...and my loathing for women who attempt to balance the unequal scale of gender.

And 3rdlibra... chill the fuck out. Let me see if I can sum up the array of dumb things YOU'VE said in your little rants...

"It's because of you that terrotists exist" (How can I be the reason for something that doesn't exist? {terrotists} hahahaha... what a woman)

"Bow down to my superior female intellect " (HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA)

"Most humans evolved to surpass sexism" (Darwin is spinning in his grave)

Need I go on?

Honestly, 3rdlibra...
It's a waste of your time to go look up stuff about the origin of the wedding dress, and the logistics of anatomy... especially when you could be putting that time to something MEANINGFUL...like... giving head to some guy you just met in a parking lot.

Seriously... 3rdlibra... I think we should call a truce...let's find a middle ground.


We can both agree that you'd look better bent over
Tuesday, May 13th, 2003
10:48 pm
Women
What do girls think they’re doing? They’re withholding sex from men, they’re working…they have no business doing man-jobs. Women have three jobs in life:
1)Cook my food
2)Sexually pleasure me
3)Clean my house

There’s nothing equal about men and women, women are inferior, and emotionally feeble. Feminists are as close to men as women can be, since they’re all dykes. They like women as men do, but that’s where the similarities end.
The kitchen and bedroom should be the only place they go without a vacuum cleaner.

When I get married, I should get a blowjob at a whim, and a sandwich at the ding of a bell. If I say “bend over” and she doesn’t do it…she should enjoy TAKING the beating as much as I enjoy ADMINISTERING it.
She should have a vocabulary limited to “yes”, “harder”, and “What would you like on that?”.
When I get married, I will expect everything in this article, and during the seven days of every month where she’s a bitch, I’m going to lock the slut in the bathroom… with a George Forman grill of course…you know…so she can still make my food.
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